Personal work drives me. Since the beginning of my photo career, I’ve been passionate about capturing the people I love. I’d never share them anywhere because I didn’t want to risk it being rejected, misinterpreted or not liked. It’s taken me 10 years to understand that I shouldn’t hide my inspiration. I shouldn’t pretend like all I ever do is paid work. So here I am, showing you my lover. Louis means so much to me, he is the man who has pursued my heart relentlessly. He loves me fiercely, he gives me the love I deserve (and often times the love I don’t deserve). But beyond the laughter, lovemaking, parenting and beautiful life we have built together, he has gone through some challenging seasons of life.
I specifically wanted to capture this season. It’s uncertain, vulnerable, raw, real, tense, and just plain hard. He chooses to walk in faith where the ground is unstable. There’s nothing to hold on to. There are moments when worship is enough and moments when it’s not. There are days when he needs to cry just because the feelings have been stuck inside for too long. There is anger that comes out out of nowhere to unveil a hurting heart. Around us there is injustice, there is corruption. There’s also healing and moments of gratitude. They are few, but they’re there.
He continues to love, to fight, to encourage, to lift up and keep on going. God sometimes shows up in mighty ways during his quiet times; sometimes he wonders if He’s there at all.
My insecurities rise up as the day of the shoot approaches.
I felt inadequate to step up to the task.
How do I conceptualize feelings?
How do I serve him through this session?
How do I show him what I see?
I do what I would do in any other shoot, I grab my camera and I love him well.